We're So Good For Each Other - A Love Letter To My Human

Dear Sage,

I love you, you love me. We're one happy family!

I have found my humanmate. Our relationship keeps me healthy: I sense your love and affection, which helps me stay relaxed and feel safe. Your stroking and caressing makes my body release endorphins, which makes me feel happy. You feed me, keep me clean, and play with me. I am one lucky dog.

In return, I am your most loyal servant. I love you unconditionally, and I never judge you (except for when you feed our neighbor's crazy cat. With what should be my salmon. Ruff.). I protect you with my life, and I am some of your best medicine.

When it was just the two of us, I helped alleviate your feelings of loneliness and isolation. Was there ever a boring moment with me around? Nope! And I kept you socializing: together we met all kinds of new humans and their pets, in training school, prowling the 'hood, and of course at the dog park. In fact, if it weren't for me, you wouldn't have met your hubbin' that day at the beach, when I grabbed his burger on the sly and took off under the boardwalk!

For a while there, you weren't sure if you would have children. Because of me, your new relationship incorporated another being (me) and you both began to co-parent. Together I helped you reconnect to your own childhoods, and experience the world with wonder once again. This brought you closer than ever, and helped set the stage for baby!

After you had baby Jake, you needed a fitness partner. Fortunately for you, I have never been a procrastinator when it comes to taking a walk! Actually, forget the walk: I had you running around our block thrice, 2 times daily. Remember the time I lost all rationale, and practically re-sowed farmer Matt's flower garden looking for that garden snake? That was a great lower body work-out day, right? 1200 calories later, I was helping you get your bitchin' body back.

I have always had a knack for reducing stress in your life. Somehow, I just know what to do when you're ailing. Remember the time you had a slipped disk, and you were in so much pain? Knowing this I did what anyone who loved you would do: I distracted you! How? By knawing the heel off your new Louboutin. Pain in back, forgotten! Ok fine, you were still stressed. But after a time-out (me, again), we nuzzled and rubbed, and in a few licks you were successfully in touch with a master shoe-repairman. Up and at 'em!

Finally, I am a great influence on little boy Jake. Because I am so unconditional, I help teach him about being unconditional, too. In taking care of me, he is learning how to take care of others (including himself), and growing up to be such a compassionate young man. I am so ruffing proud.

Love is all you need, right Sage? And me love you long time.

XO, Buster

Photo Credit: bdwaydiva1

Chompin' At The Savoy - Picking The Right Chew Toy

Ok friends, today I'm throwing you all a bone! If there's one thing we dogs, cats and otherwise can agree on, it's that we like to get down with a good gnaw. It satisfies a primal urge within us, helps keep our teeth clean and breath fresh, and is just paws down good fun!

Sadly, many of my friends in the past have been injured during chew time. Large amounts of rawhide can cause bloating and obstructions, cooked bones are brittle and can tend to splinter into nasty pieces. And one of my fabulous feline ladies once spent a night in the bathtub, after attacking her owner's Manolo that looked identical to her satiny plaything. Poor pussy.

It seems pretty clear to me that our humans would love to help us satisfy our natural instinct to chew, but not all nibbles are created equal! First of all, a few things must be considered:

- What kind of a chewer are you? Are you the circling, pouncing, mow-down-in-2-minutes type? A longer lasting rubber toy might be your best bet, like the Kong (my personal fave). Perhaps you like to savor every tiny bit and piece, in which case a more natural selection would be best - pig's ears, anyone?

- How big are you? Your chops should be able to get that toy right to the back of your molars, but not all the way in your mouth. ACK! No choking hazards, please!

- Know yourself: if you like to break off pieces to eat, that toy better be ingestible. And make sure when to dig and bury - anything small enough to fit into your mouth is a choking hazard.

- Are you a messy eater? No pet wants to be reprimanded for going to town on his or her toy, Where's the fun in that? Make sure that toy won't leave stains anywhere.

- If you love the real thing, make eyes at an uncut beef bone. They can be found at butcher shops, and are ruffing awesome. And again, yea Dogs forgo the cooked bones! Unless you want a ride to the hospital, which I know you most certainly do not.

Chewsing a chew toy means knowing yourself, and how to stay safe. There's more to getting boned (or ragged, or balled, or konged) than chomping down. Take care, and to thine pet selves, be chew!

Love, Buster (aka Chew-bakka)

Photo Credit: leozaza

Photo Credit: ritingonthewall

Walk The Dog (And Cat, And Rabbit, And Ferret)

Walk, walk, walk, lucky dog, lucky dog, I'm a lucky dog, straight into traffic ACK! Walk, walk, walk, luckylucky, let's smell that flower ACK! Walk, walk, walk, there'sasquirrelrunforit ACK!

That was my typical daily monologue in my early years, when my human Sage first started to train me. We would walk together every day, me on my leash next to her. That ACK! was me choking every time she yanked my chain, which was what a breeder had suggested she do. It was terrible for me, my throat hurt, my skin pinched. Impawssible.

Thankfully, on one of my morning yanks Sage and I ran into our dog training friend. He took one look at my "choke chain" and told Sage to chuck it. Why? As he explained, I had passed the training stage, and no longer needed to be corrected with power-steering. And in fact, the collar she was using might actually encourage me to pull harder! Instead, he suggested, Sage needed to outfit me with a comfortable, adjustable harness. When on leash, she would be able to maintain control and haul me back in, without choking me to death. We went shopping!

Pet harnesses are necessary for all kinds of reasons. There are the obvious safety reasons: keeping the bigguns away from the li'l uns, keeping the cats from hauling tail up a tree (and not coming down), protecting us from traffic. There are medical reasons, like when one of us has a sensitive trachea or coughing issues, and in these cases harnesses help support us. Harnesses also keep us from slipping out of our collars, but won't leave us hanging (if you know what I mean. ACK!).

Here are some tips when choosing a harness:

- Shop with measurements. You'll know the harness will fit! A harness should be snug, but not too tight.

- Make sure the harness is adjustable. It will fit properly, and will expand if pet does. While you're at it, check to make sure the thickness of the harness straps are proportional for the size of pet.

- Pick a type: training (yes, it can be done without the choke), H-harness, car belt (buckle up baby!).

Things to avoid:

- Harnesses that are not adjustable.

- Bulky, thick leather - too uncomfortable! Try a harness made from soft cotton or bamboo.

There are some great sites selling harnesses. Some of my faves:

Gentle Leader

Scrappy Pet

Kitty Holster

Rabbit Harness

Ferret Couture

So who wants to go for a W-A-L-K? Oh yeah, I see those wagging tails and twitching whiskers! Now before you fetch your leash for your human, make sure it's the right kind.

Get lucky!

Love, Buster

Photo Credit: shamanic-shift

Got Milk (Thistle)?

Ok, listen up all you booze-hounds and cats. This is a bit of a sobering article. Many of us need serious liver support, for all kinds of reasons: cat and dog liver disease, dog cushings disease...

I wanted to give you all a yap about an incredible ingredient, because it's so ruffing important!

Since writing to you about how our humans create treatments for us pets, I've been reading up about milk thistle. Many of our Mediterranean, N. African and Middle Eastern kin will know the flowering plant, which grows leaves mottled with milky looking splashes. Humans have used milk thistle for like 14,000 doggie years (2,000 in human) to treat stomach problems, liver ailments and bitchiness (I think they call it PMS, but I digress).

When it comes to the liver, the active ingredient called silymarin ap-paw-ently protects the cells by removing and blocking toxins. It can also stimulate cell regeneration. Milk thistle has become a majorly important ingredient in our beast world: recently one of my beagle brothers, Bill, was part of a study wherein silymarin protected him from the toxic effects of mushroom poisoning (Dog, some brothers will eat anything. Sigh. Don't let us near fungus of any kind - read my article on Foods To Avoid HERE).

Silymarin is generally given in tablet or capsule form (hack hack! It makes me gag just thinking about it), but buck up buddies: your human will easily be able to add it to food. You won't notice a thing, except how amazing you'll eventually feel. You'll be jumping for joy!

To your health, Buster

Photo Credit: adamwilson

Don't Feed The Animals - Foods To Avoid

There is a reason why humans teach us not to beg for food. Besides the fact that it is really, really annoying to them (and my friends, we are choosers and not beggars), people food is just not pet food. Yes, we pets would do very well indeed on a diet of fresh vegetables, oils, and protein. But not on a people plate, and not drenched in sauces and followed by dessert. If it's up to me, I poo-poo that party platter before it can make a pooper outta me. Know what I'm, yapping?

Digestion issues aside, allowing pets to eat human food can result in far worse problems. Allergic reactions, organ damage and even death can all be avoided by keeping us away from the pantry. In keeping with my vow to help my fellow beasts stay safe, behold a list of DON'T EAT THESE (capitals intended):

Chocolate: especially cocoa powder and baking chocolate. Lock the pantry! Theobromine is the compound that gets us, which is a cardiac stimulant and diuretic. Just because we look fine after eating it, don't assume we're ok. Sickness and death can happen up to a day after eating! Symptoms include staggering, labored breathing, vomiting, diarrhea, abdominal pain, tremors, fever, heart rate increase, arrhythmia, seizures, coma, death.

Raw Eggs: Look, we're not body builders, ok? Avidin is an enzyme in raw egg whites that can lead to skin/hair/coat problems. Salmonella also might be present.

Gum: Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've all heard that awkward family tale about one of our brothers or sisters running around with a bubble blowing out of their behinds. I'm bursting that bubble right now, by telling you that additives in commercial gum can decrease blood sugar, potentially causing death. Don't blow it! *Humans shouldn't be eating it, either.

Onions and Garlic: Your human will be crying long after they've cut and cooked these bad bulbs. If we get our chomps on one of these, not only will we burn out our mouths, but we can be poisoned up to a few days after eating. Pets poisoned by onions will develop haemolytic anemia, where our red blood cells burst while circulating in our body. Symptoms include labored breathing, liver damage, vomiting, diarrhea, and discoloured urine.

Cow Milk: Come on. It's baby food, and it's not even OUR baby food. No way are our bodies going to be able to digest it. Enuff said?

Grapes and Raisins: Eating these nibbles can cause kidney failure and death. Times that by 100, if they're chocolate coated. Symptoms include vomiting, diarrhea, abdominal pain, and lethargy, kidney failure and even death.

Mushrooms: As they are for humans, mushrooms can be beyond psychedelic: they can be fatal. Don't eat them, period. Symptoms include conversations with DOG, abdominal pain, drooling, liver damage, kidney damage, vomiting, diarrhea, convulsions, coma, and death.

Raw Fish: No, Japanese pets don't eat sushi! A compound called thiaminases can break down our Vitamin B1. Loss of appetite, seizures, and in severe cases, death are known problems associated with raw fish consumption in cats. Can it (instead)!

Avacadoes: All animals need to avoid this fruit (yes, it is. It grows on trees. Look it up, dawg). Persin is a poison found mostly in the pit, but spreads throughout even to the skin. We reject it from both ends, you dig?

Macadamia Nuts: I don't care how many Menahune Men you've stalked and chewed apart -don't make these part of your Hawaiian vacation. Their high phosphorus content is said to possibly lead to bladder stones. Dogs develop a tremor of the skeletal muscles, and weakness or paralysis of the hindquarters. Affected dogs are often unable to rise and are distressed, usually panting. Some affected dogs have swollen limbs and show pain when the limbs are manipulated.

Other Animal Food: Cat food is for cats, dog food for dogs. Human food for humans. Each is designed for the mouth it feeds. The point of this article. Heed!

Bones: So yes, I have a bone to pick. Next week I will be advising what sorts of bones are great for us to eat, but for the most part they are no-nos. Why? Brittle and sharp, these bones can break apart after eating them and puncture us on the inside. For us, it's like eating glass. No!

So the next time a well meaning human tries to tempt you with a turkey-looking-tidbit - and I'm not saying bite the hand that feeds here, but - definitely give it your coldest shoulder. Stick with your own tasty goodness, and keep yourself safe!

I'm off for kibble, Buster

Photo Credit: 35188692@N00

We Remember You

Bark Bark! To the horses, cats, dogs and other animal brothers and sisters whose lives served to help save other lives.

And to their humans, who needed them to love, stay warm, and keep their faith - and whose lives served to save other lives, too.

Thank you. We remember you all.

Love, Buster

Photo Credit: jono2k5

My Dog Had Fleas - Neem To The Rescue

Being the naturalist that I am, I usually know where in nature to turn when I feel a little ruff. A certain rumble in my tummy tells me to chew some grass, a few licks to a hurt and I'm as good as healed.

Humans, like us animals, have always turned to nature when it comes to treating ailments. While we keep things simple: eat grass, poop out, they use more sophisticated methods: get in shiny horse, herd bottles, consume insides of bottles like treats, etc. I don't know what's inside those bottles, but I know those little treats don't grow on trees by themselves! Humans, being the masters, take their grasses and leaves and make treats, drinks, and baths as remedies. I bark: whatever makes you better, friends.

As simple as I am, I know that there are some things that I can't always fix. What I end up needing is a dose of those humanified treats/drinks/baths to help me. Take for example the time when I had an itch that I just couldn't scratch. It was late springtime, aka flea season, and I had become a complete flea-bag. Not only could I not sleep (have you ever tried to zzz through a nocturnal 3-ring circus? I almost lost my doggie-mind), but I kept my family awake with my obsessive itching and licking. Itchyitchyitchyitchyitchy!

After one particularly mad all-nighter (imagine a burning inferno to the tune of da da dadadada da da da da on warp speed for 8 hours), my human Sage took matters into her own hands. I'm not one for baths, but my instincts told me that the bar of soap in her hand, smelling like a bad onion, was exactly what I needed. She lathered, I soaked, and I watched as hundreds of those flea-clowns jumped ship. That night all was cool and quiet on my back and front, and my itching-scratching-licking-biting was minimal. I slept like a pup.

Turns out my human (hot dog she's smart) had used a special soap with the bug-busting herb,neem. An evergreen tree found in India, neem has been a natural pesticide and bug repellent for centuries. All parts of the tree are used: seeds, leaves, flowers, and even its bark (no pun intended). Humans use neem to treat their own pests, too (worms, pimples, and fevers). I understand that the oil and parts of neem can be made into soaps, shampoos, and even teas and treats. I myself have been the dogful recipient of Neem Soap , and since the circus came to my town I have been almost flea-free.

I could have done my doggie business until the cows came home, but I never could have evicted those critters myself. Thank dogness for Sage and her Neem Soap! It wasn't my odor of choice - I prefer wet dog or fermenting food - but after relief like that I'll odorize with bad onion any day. And I'll take human help whenever I can get it!

Love, Buster