I Like It Doggy Style – A Human’s Guide To Catching your Pet Some Tail

Well, kitties and pups, it’s that time of year again! That’s right fuzzy-folks, the amorous month of February has us chasing tails – and not just our own – just in time for spring.

Just like our human friends, once the sun starts warming things up we start to get a little hot under our flea collars, too. As in, we want to get it on! But don’t get me wrong: just because we’re hawt-to-trot doesn’t mean we’ll do it with just about anything. And so, I’ve compiled a guide for our humans, to help them help US mate. Throw a dog a bone, pals!
Chemistry Is Everything – Not All Breeds Can Breed!
First of all, take your job, human, as match-maker responsibly. Be choosy! Finding us the right mate takes time and patience, and a lot of research. Mixing breeds is just like mixing personalities: chemistry is everything! So make sure you know what breed your pet is compatible with. For more on this tip, check out what my Professor has to yap!
Health Is Wealth
Just like choosing a mate, making sure our mates are healthy is key! After all, our potential mate’s health will impact our litters to come. Make sure you obtain a full medical disclosure, and research the breed. Some breeds are more prone to pawticular ailments, so beware!
It’s All For Show
I’m no show dawg, but if I were I’d want a bitch with class. That is: her papers! But then I’d have to be a stud dog (which I am, but if you’re a breeder you know what I mean), which requires so much work. I hear the human equivalent is called “metro-sexual”, a man who is constantly groomed, but to me that’s too much work. Where’s the fun in not being able to roll around in the hay – in the dirt? But anyhow, if you’re breeding for show, get the papers. Enough said.
Leave Us Alone
Once you’ve found a great tail for us to chase around, introduce us and then leave us alone. We’ll do our business, and you’ll have done yours. I’ll be one lucky dog!
In Love, Buster
Photo Credit: markhillary

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